April 8, 2003
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Letter from Prison
An old man lived alone in Jackson, Wyoming. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work.
His only son, Bob, who used to help him, was in prison.
The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his predicament.
Dear Bob,
I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my
potato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me.
Love, Dad
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Dad
For heaven’s sake, Dad, don’t dig up the garden! That’s where I buried the GUNS!
Love, Bob
At 4 A.M. the next morning, a dozen ATF agents and local police officers showed up and dug up the entire area without finding any guns. They apologized to the old man and left.
That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Dad,
Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. It’s the best I could do under the
circumstances.
Love, Bob
Virgo
Analytical Virgo, as the sixth sign of the zodiac, you represent purity, perfection, and practicality. Virgos put things in order to unify the world. Mercury, the planet of mental and intellectual principles, and ruler of Virgo, makes you a methodical and organized worker who brings an analytical, systematic approach to all facets of life. You project a serious image overall, one only strengthened by your problem-solving skills and fastidious refinement.
Yours is the second of the earth signs, which makes you a dependable, responsible individual. You are reserved and modest in your behavior, and discriminating in your choices. You connect strongly to Mother Earth, and are therefore extremely health-conscious.
As a Virgo, you rule the sixth house of the horoscope, associated with the quality of work. Furthermore, this section of the chart shows how you analyze, deal with, and communicate details. The sixth house also involves health matters in general.
Virgo mode is mutable, which means that you are a levelheaded communicator who makes sure that whatever is being discussed is precise and accurate. Your role in a team is that of quality control.
Your strengths lie in your sharp mental powers, especially in scientific, or technical areas. You are well spoken and witty, and have a good understanding of other people’s problems. Above all, you’re a great problem solver, providing clear analysis to complex issues.
Your weaknesses are that you tend to be too much of a perfectionist, which can lead you to pedantic, petty, or schoolmasterly behavior. Your critical and sometimes negative outlook on life can be a downer for others, who may describe you as reserved, overly critical, and timid.
Although most of the above description does seem to fit me, I have to disagree with one word used in the last paragraph… ‘pedantic.’ From the Webster’s Dictionary definition of that word, it absolutely does NOT fit with my personality. I am far from unimaginative (ask anyone who’s read or listened to me recently!
) Although I do tend to run on a narrow track while doing research, I do get easily side-tracked & have been known to be looking in one place for one particular topic when something else catches my eye & I’m off & running in a whole other direction until I drag myself back to the original topic, because I love to learn new things.
I looked up ‘ostentatiously’ as well, wanting to know specifically what the Zodiac writer was intending since it is part of the definition of pedantic. I find the definition entirely off with that. I am not conspicuous, vainglorious or pretentious in my learning. I quickly learned as a child NOT to raise my hand when I had the correct answer, since doing so only brought on alot of abusive torment & teasing by my classmates. When I only wanted to help them learn, they turned my knowledge into something I almost despised, so I mostly set myself off in an unnoticed corner all through my years in school & college. It has been very difficult for me in recent years to present what I learn (present tense, because one never stops learning!), especially with the constant berating I get from so many. But I just can’t stop myself from trying to help others to learn what can make changes for the good.
Main Entry: pe·dan·tic
Pronunciation: pi-’dan-tik
Function: adjective
Date: circa 1600
1 : of, relating to, or being a pedant
2 : narrowly, stodgily, and often ostentatiously learned
3 : UNIMAGINATIVE, PEDESTRIAN
Main Entry: os·ten·ta·tious
Pronunciation: -sh&s
Function: adjective
Date: 1673
: marked by or fond of conspicuous or vainglorious and sometimes pretentious display
synonym see SHOWY
- os·ten·ta·tious·ly adverb
- os·ten·ta·tious·ness noun
